Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Life for Rent

this song started playing on the radio on my way home from work and I was reminded how temporary life on earth is.

"If my life is for rent... I deserve nothing more than I get, cause nothing I have is truely mine" I don't know what Dido's thoughts were with these lyrics but I know that these words got me thinking about heaven, and my purpose here on earth.

I was put here on earth for God's purpose. To love him, serve him and praise him above all things until that day when I can be with him in heaven. What we have now won't last forever it's here today gone tomorrow, the only stable thing is God and the hope and promise of heaven. Only a few days ago I was reminded to live life with a heavenly perspective, looking forward to heaven and living a life that is pleasing to God.

This is my goal- to please him, but I know I fall short everyday. I make mistakes, big and small, but somehow and for some reason I am still loved. This truth amazes me- there is nothing I could do that would make him love me less.

This life is but a moment in the eternal love of God. How often is it that we get caught up in the world and what it offers?

Dido's song reminded me that what we get- what we are provided with is all a gift and we should be thankful for anything that we get because it is all a gift it is all a matter of sustaining life until we are called home, isn't it?
picture courtesy of

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Forgiveness is a promise...

How do you ever forgive someone who hurt you so incredibly, the person who ripped the world out from underneath your feet and struck you over the back of the head with it, more than that how do you forgive them when they not only hurt you but also the ones closest to you- your family?
When you are dealing with your own hurt and seeing it also in the faces of the ones you love how do you forgive the one who caused it?
We are supposed to forgive, but how and why?
Why because until you decide to forgive someone the pain and the hurt you feel will stay with you, it will eat you up and ultimatley cause bitterness and anger that will affect not only your own life but also the life of others.
I always thought that in order to forgive someone they needed to first say sorry, but what if they don't say sorry, what if you hear nothing even remotely close or similar to an apology, does that mean you are off the hook? does that mean that forgiveness is not necessary.
I honestly believed that the answer to these questions was "yes" for me it was as simple as no apology, no forgiveness! It's never that simple.
The apology didn't come and the pain didn't cease, I had to come to a decision where I could forgive so that I could get on with healing. Waiting around for an apology that may never come feeds the pain and prevents the healing process from beginning.
So In my own time when I was ready I forgave, and from that point things started to get brighter, and while i was still hurt- am still hurt, I can deal with that pain more easily. How did I get to that point? with this simple quote... "forgiveness is a promise, not a feeling!" A promise to myself, a promise to God, and a promise to move on with living.

image via:, "Stay Ali: Forgive me Fraulein LP"

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Work in Progress...

two rugs

two cardigans

one skirt

four bears

a horse...

...and the list goes on

I am queen of unfinished projects. I love to knit, it is soothing and relaxing and a wonderful distraction from the world but sometimes i get to a point where there is just no desire to finish a project, i get distracted by something more challenging, a new book, a relationship, sleep whatever it is i just don't always get to finish all my projects.

At the same time there is something comforting about those unfinished projects, they stay there, they wait and they don't put any pressure on me to perform. Those projects won't leave and at any time I can pick up the knitting needlees and start from where i left off. I didn't say it made sense but those boxes of unfinished projects bring a sense of security, warmth and comfort.

Hearts don't break even.

Yes she's rash, she doesn't stop to listen, she is unreasonable and she ruins a beautiful bunch of flowers- but i know how she feels and at the end of the day maybe the only answer is as "The Script" says "a heart don't break even"
I've seen the world through a broken heart, my broken heart. Yes Carrie should have stopped and let Big explain but maybe when your heart is this crushed there is no opportuntiy for sensibilities.

Credit for the girl in the wondow.
I wanted a simple picture to sum up this blog, my view of the world- i found the above picture and looked no further.


...Be! After viewing the wonderful blog my sisters have created i was inspired to offer my own thoughts and perspectives of the world, while also just trying to be me. So this blog may seem nonsensical and out of step but hey thats me. And this blog is my time to Just Be, Me.

Welcome to my world i hope you enjoy the view.